When I'm older I'm going to sell my life's stories to some hollywood movie producer and make millions. Or at least sell them to Jay Peterman and make a couple thousand.
I'm considering selling this one.
A couple years ago I "dated" a boy. I use the quotations because we were never defined. Let's just say for a few months we went on dates every weekend, if not twice a week. I never thought he really liked me, but man, did I like him. We stopped going out on dates because it was "busy season" at his work. He assured me that was why. But I knew better.
Months without contact pass, he calls me out of the blue. Why? He is at Home Depot and wants to know what tools he should buy to build a fence. Obviously not the reason. Several minutes in, he casually asks if I am dating anyone. Nope. He then proceeds to tell me about the amazing new girl he is infatuated with. Ok dude. I get it. You haven't called me in 3 months. I pretty sure you don't like me. You don't have to call me and tell me you are dating someone else. I end the phone call by interrupting him with "Uh...shoot...I have to go! bye!"
Several more months pass without contact, he calls me again. He wants to know if he can give my number to a boy he knows. Sure, why not? He then slips in something about his "fiancé". "Oh you're engaged?" (I already knew he was). "Yeah, you didn't know that?" Like I was supposed to know. I did, but he shouldn't know that I did.
Even more months pass without one bit of contact, I get a voicemail from him. "Hey, can you call back as soon as you can? I need to ask you something important". I wait a couple hours and call him back. What is it this time? He wants a ride to the airport, to fly to his wedding. He insists that he will drive to my house and then I take him there. "What do I with your car after I drop you off?" "Well I was thinking that I could just leave my car in your parking spot." Seriously? "I dont' have a parking spot. And you are going to come get your car later?" "Well I was thinking that you could come pick us up from the airport too". "After your honeymoon!?" Oh HECK no! I called him a jerk and hung up.
Maybe not as good as Kramer's pants story.
7 comments:
wow banana, you never told me about the request to take him to the airport and pick him up from the honeymoon! what a jerk! boys are pretty stupid sometimes.
You dodged a bullet. The poor girl that ended up with him is the one I feel bad for. Eeew.
Amen! What a story, I got a good laugh out of this one! I hope this never happens again to you!
His poor new wife!!! So glad you didn't end up with him. You totally deserve better in life.
~Emily
Wow. That is beyond lame. Wow. You dodged a bullet there!
ha ha. I've never heard about this guy. What an idiot...good for you for calling him a just
I've heard that story before and it is still just as great as the first time I heard it! Too funny!
Julie
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